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Registered From:	November 27, 2004, 4:00 am
Gender:	Female
Age:	21
Location:	United States, Ohio, Fairborn
Self Description:	I really don't know where to start off considering I've been doing some soul searching the past couple months, and I have yet to know who I truly am, but let's start from the beginning. I've grown up in a home that is very dysfunctional, because of all the fighting, drug/alcohol addictions that surrounds me. I never had anything handed to me on a silver platter. My mom and dad had to work hard just to put food on the table, and clothes on our backs. Other than my dad's alcoholism every thing was going good. I was comfortable with the life I had been given. Then around the age of eleven every thing began going down hill. My dad stopped working, he began pounding whatever he could find in the house for crack. Our home and family was falling apart before my own two eyes. My grades started dropping, and I became more and more depressed as the years flew by. When I was fourteen I ended up losing my virginity, and shortly after I began sleeping around. I wasn't secure with who I was, and I felt if I slept with guys I'd get the comfort I needed if only for a night. I began getting into drugs around the age of fifteen. I knew drugs were bad, and I had seen the impact it has on people's lives but I wanted to escape, and at the time I seen it as my only solution because all though I tried cutting myself I was too much of a coward to actually go deep enough. Drugs became the only thing I could depend on for about a year. When I was sober I was completely miserable. I was always out hanging with the wrong crowd looking for the next buzz. But, after a while I hated who I was even more then I did before. I was disgusted. So, I've been trying to get my life back on track. I've given up the bad influences, and the drugs. I still get drunk on weekends, but it's for fun, because I've become happy with myself. My dad gave up crack 3 and 1/2 months ago, and I'm very proud of him. I'm afraid drugs have ruined me, but I made stupid decisions now I'm paying for them. My immune system is broken down, I have panic attacks, and I have anxiety built up in me every day. I think the only cure is to just stay away from the things I was doing before. On a lighter note. I'm a very dependent, hopeless romantic, the type of girl who wears her heart on her sleeve type. I fell in love a little bit over a year ago with a guy named Kyle, and he put me through complete hell with all the mind games. I've finally let go of him and learned how to push him away. He's still somewhat in my life, but I'm not letting us be anything other than "two people who talk on the phone every now and then." all though he's been trying hard to hang out with me. I'm not letting myself get mixed up with him again. I'm finally getting my head on straight, and I couldn't be happier.

Last Post: I love you. - Saturday, November 27, 2004, 10:27

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Member Comments - 57

Comment Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6

Gonzoman69 - November 27, 2004, 9:23 pm
you dont look like 16!!!Damn!! way hot!

babydoll198816 - November 27, 2004, 8:13 pm
ur welxome and thx for the comment, i appreciate that, i wish i was a +10 and too beautiful, but thx anyways girl! ;o))

Heatseeker - November 27, 2004, 6:49 pm
really sexy

Gonzoman69 - November 27, 2004, 11:38 am
woow your way pretty...you got my 10 and thanx for tha comment :D

jenngrll585 - November 27, 2004, 10:37 am
:-D thanks youve got really pretty eyes too !

jenngrll585 - November 27, 2004, 10:29 am
thanks girl :-D i gave ya a 10 too....very pretty

Boho - November 27, 2004, 7:36 am
Aw thankyou!

babydoll198816 - November 27, 2004, 5:54 am
ur prettiful, gave ya a 10, :o))

hawtmonkeysexx - November 27, 2004, 4:53 am
I'm gorgeous? I don't think you're giving yourself enough credit here. =P You're beyond gorgeous and you have the most beautiful eyes. heart

whorgasm